“It was in November last year when we got to know about our pregnancy. My partner had PCOD and as a part of the test we visited a doctor, however, upon her query, we did the test and it was positive the very first time. As we got the confirmation, my heart was filled with heaviness, something as if it was a huge beam of light on my face. I smiled the whole day and we informed our parents consecutively. I was initially feeling gender dysphoric as being a nonbinary trans person, for me, the idea of being a dad was something I had to ally with the binariness. But my partner’s understanding and support helped me bear the feeling. We didn’t actually plan it, but I always wanted to be a parent and was open to welcoming whenever there is a calling. When Raji (my wife) was passing through the initial months of pregnancy I felt very envious of her that why couldn’t I bear the little one in me, but it’s not that easy and Raji is the only one who can pull it up.

Trust and family support are some of the key aspects of a happy relationship.
Raji has been very supportive to me than anyone can in my life. I feel extremely happy, myself when I am with her. She understands my aspects of sexuality and gender, she understands my gender expression (drag) and leaves no stone unturned to be with me. I feel she sees me the way I see myself.

With my partner, it’s a very open conversation. As a person who is carrying, I had to understand her needs and help her time and again in the day course while also doing shows, performances, shoots, and more. She was able to help me balance it out. Even in the time of space she always made me feel her presence in my art. She would give her best of the best sarees for me to drag. Insist my friends be there with me for events and also never miss a show’s update. I believe it’s very rare to find such an understanding partner.

I am still not prepared to face the reality of how to raise them, give them support, or teach them to fight the discrimination they would face because of my queerness, but one thing we are aware that we want to raise our kid as we wanted to be raised ourselves. All we could do is teach love empathy and joy to them.

One thing I would like to say to queer couples is to be yourself. You have the right to create your family, and you have the right to live it with dignity, anyone can be a parent and all we need to do is have a heart filled with empathy to be a parent. My message to the general public is, now it’s high time to get rid of the binary family structures. Let us make more space for trans parents, trans kids, queer families, and same-sex couples and make society diverse and more intersectional. Cause neither nature nor the nurturer would limit the possibility of hugging humanity with diversity. When nature doesn’t discriminate, who are we to discriminate?”